APRIL 12, 2024
What are the causes and signs of low self-esteem and how to overcome it
Self-esteem is basically how you view yourself. This can either be positive or negative.
When you negatively view yourself it can be described as having low self-esteem. Having low self-esteem is not a one-size-fits-all in the sense that you can feel positively about yourself in some aspects of your life but have a negative view of yourself in other aspects.
For example, you can feel great about yourself in your professional life but have a negative view of yourself regarding romantic relationships.
In this post, we will talk about the cases and signs of low self-esteem and how to deal with it.
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Low self-esteem can have many different causes. It can be a combination of internal and external experiences.
Early life experiences that shape your self-concept
Negative childhood experiences such as being constantly criticized by people that you look up to, harsh punishment, abuse, and neglect can lead to a person having low self-esteem. Being bullied at school can also fall under these negative life experiences.
- Not fitting in with peers
When a person experiences social exclusion, rejection, or loneliness, it can lead to them having low self-esteem. Having a sense of belonging and acceptance by peers is very important to have healthy self-esteem. So when a person feels like they are being rejected socially, it can make them feel unworthy.
- Chronic Stress or mental health issues or serious illness
Low self-esteem can be caused by chronic stress or serious illness because these conditions may change how you see yourself. It can make a person feel like they are inadequate and will then make it difficult for them to see themselves positively.
- Traumatic Life Events
When a person experiences traumatic events or significant life events such as divorce or job loss, it can lead to them having low self-esteem.
What are the signs of low self-esteem?
It is important to know that you may display one or more of the signs listed below if you have low self-esteem. The signs of low self-esteem include:
- Criticism & self-blame
People with low self-esteem will often criticize themselves. They will often blame themselves for failures or mistakes and make themselves feel inadequate and worthless. Having low self-esteem will also make a person overly apologetic.
- Eager to please others
People with low self-esteem often find it difficult to set boundaries in relationships and are very eager to please others. This may lead to them tolerating mistreatment and disrespect from others because they don’t feel like they deserve better treatment.
- Developing bad habits
Low self-esteem can cause people to develop bad habits which they will use as coping mechanisms. These bad habits or coping mechanisms may include picking their skin or biting their nails.
- Downplaying your achievements
People with low self-esteem will often downplay their achievements. Linked to this, they often have a difficult time accepting compliments and positive feedback from others. This is because they feel unworthy of acknowledgment.
- Having a negative self-image
Having a negative self-image means that a person has a negative view of themselves in certain aspects of their life. They will then focus on their flaws or shortcomings and not recognize their positive qualities.
- Striving for perfectionism
The reason why people with low self-esteem will strive for perfectionism is because they want to use it to prove their self-worth. What they don’t know is that perfectionism will lead to increased stress and anxiety.
- Social withdrawal
When people have low self-esteem they will often withdraw from others and prefer to be in isolation. This is because they feel unworthy of other people’s company and do not want to be judged by their peers.
- Depression and anxiety
Depression and anxiety can often be linked to low self-esteem. When you are constantly negatively viewing yourself or engaging in negative self-talk, it can contribute to a person feeling sad, hopeless, and anxious about the future.
- Avoidance of opportunities
Having low self-esteem will cause a person to avoid opportunities because they are afraid of failure or rejection. Because they feel like they will not succeed they don’t want to pursue goals or take risks.
- Self-consciousness and sensitivity to criticism
People with low self-esteem can be very sensitive to criticism or rejection from others. They may think that constructive feedback are personal attack which can make them defensive and withdraw from the situation.
- Lacking confidence
Having low self-esteem can make a person have a lack of confidence and they do not believe in their abilities.
How to overcome low self-esteem
Dealing with low self-esteem can be very hard, but with time, effort, and support it can be possible. Below we have outlined so things you can do to overcome low self-esteem.
Identify negative beliefs about yourself and challenge them
To identify the negative beliefs about yourself you should write them down. The next step will then be to write down all your positive traits. This can be anything that you like about yourself and what other people have mentioned that they like about you as well. Make sure that you have at least 5 items on your list and keep adding to that positive list. What can help is making a list of your achievements, skills, and positive qualities, and referring to it regularly to remind yourself of your worth.
Build positive relationships and try to repair or completely leave toxic relationships.
Having positive relationships in life is so important. The people in life that people build relationships with are people that they should be able to count on. Having toxic relationships can become very draining and you can become emotionally tired. To change this, a person should either fix toxic relationships or leave them altogether.
Become assertive and set boundaries
This is where you should learn to assertively communicate your needs and boundaries in relationships. Together with doing this, you should distance yourself from negative influences.
Take on new challenges
Taking on new challenges will help you to become more sure of yourself. This will help you deal with any fears you may have and build up your self-worth in your eyes, which is what is most important.
Look after yourself
There are many ways that you can look after yourself. To start with you can take care of yourself physically by:
Exercising
Spending time outside
Avoiding alcohol, drugs and smoking
Sleep 8 hours
Eating healthy
You can take care of yourself mentally by:
Practicing self-compassion
Practicing self-care
Seeking professional help
Practicing mindfulness
Seeking support from trusted family and friends
Conclusion
It is important to know that low self-esteem can be very complex. Its causes and signs or characteristics can be different from person to person. To deal with low self-esteem a person often has to do a combination of things such as self-reflection, therapy, support from others, and take steps to deal with negative beliefs and behaviors.
Important: This post is for informational and educational purposes only. This post should not be taken as therapy advice, financial advice or used as a substitute for such. You should always speak to your own therapist or financial advisor before implementing this information on your own. Thank you!
